“is that your real hair?”
“Is that your real hair” said almost no one yet everyone.
I was on set one beautiful day getting my hair and make-up done, happily chatting away with all the other creative artists and stylists in the room, soaking up the beauty ritual of hair, make-up, last looks and then shooting when suddenly, an influx of people came into the already set aura of a beauty parlor-which I didn’t notice fully as I was so incapsulated with how beautiful I was looking thanks to the heavenly hands of a seasoned trained professional- when the dreaded question got popped:
“Wait, Tsola, is that your real hair?”
First off, could you say hello? Rude. Nonetheless:
Silence filled the room.
Should I answer? Should I ignore? Should I lie? (lol) You know the old saying: “if I bought it, then it IS mine, well technically” I could hit em’ with one of those but instead I mindlessly and quickly gathered all my words and spit out:
“No.”
With a few added sweet nothings to jazz up my response and ease my own discomfort.
Now why in the world would I be asked if my hair was real or not? Parts of me feels kinda good about it, as the type of hair extensions I was wearing had folks scratching their heads in wonder and disbelief: could a dark skin black women have such long hair? Short answer, yes. Yet, the question comes with a load of other questions: “Why is that so astonishing?” “Why don't you ask other races if their hair is real?” As I sat back in my seat, hoping for anyone, someone, to come to my rescue, I Iooked in the mirror and realized something: I am black. Lol, and sorts of questions get asked like that quite often to people of color. Instead of feeling weird about it, let’s educate the children: black hair grows and grows long. As for me, I’ve done many big chops and buzz cuts time and time again, yet was able to have such a simple yet complex fluidity in the way I get to wear my hair in it’s style and length. If we’d all take a good look around God’s green earth, we’d see how dynamic, healthy, and special all types of hair can be.
This made me wonder: why don’t other races get asked if their hair is real or not? I was faced with the realization that a bunch of different women (in this case) and hair types are matching their hair extensions to their natural hair textures. So to the human eye, one wouldn’t even think to ask otherwise because the extentions are giving scalp! Whereas, you’ll see in the masses, a lot of women are wearing hair extension textures that may or may not be their unique natural textures or they are wearing their natural hair textures, but technically it would require some type of manipulation to get in that state. Hear me out, ain’t NOTHING wrong with wearing whatever wig, texture, length or color. But it did make me stop and ponder the reality of not thinking to extend our natural hair textures and opting for anothers. Realizing after a while that when I’m out and about, minding my business, going for a stroll, and I happen to have on an afro wig, I’m met with questions on how long did it take me to grow my hair and how beautiful it is compared to when I’m wearing my 60 inch Peruvian water wave buss down, the girlies are asking me where I got my hair from and we all gawk about the quality of this bought hair: it all feels like maddness! Yet, I’ve come to understand it and not judge it harshly. One, the inability to diversify black hair textures but honestly the hard truth and question of why DO we wear hair extensions (outside of our pure free will) that aren’t extending our natural hair textures. So many questions that need so many answers. What do y’all think?
